First let me say there is no right or wrong way to enjoy the swinger lifestyle, it is all a matter of individual sexual preference. While straight, bi, and gay females/males that are single, part of a couple, trio, etc. are part of the swinger community, a majority of people who attend swinger parties tend to be couples consisting of bisexual females with a straight male partner and this is typically who swinger party promoters cater to.

Because a large percentage of ladies are bisexual and already have a male partner, many women (but not all) are looking to play with another women and because many of the men are straight, they too are looking to play with, or watch their female partner play with another women. This results in a greater demand for single bisexual females and a lower demand for single males at many swinger parties. It also creates a problem for the event promoter as typically a very low percentage of women are interested in attending events without a partner but a large percentage of males without a partner are interested in attending.

In an effort to keep the promoters core business of M/F couples happy, the promoter will typically do what they can to create a balanced “supply and demand” of single males and females with different price points or ‘limited/no admittance rules’ such as the ones mentioned in your original posting.

There seems to be a perception that women tend to be more ‘naturally’ bisexual than men are. Women “getting it on” with each other at these parties isn’t offputting to anyone. Men with men, however, would likely discomfort participants. It’s not fair, but male homosexual acts are not as accepted by mainstream society as female homosexual acts. My partner likes gay men very much. However, he doesn’t want to watch two guys getting it on. It just doesn’t it do it for him.

When you’re at a swinging party, it is an intimate experience, to say the least — to foster intimacy organisers take great lengths to create the right atmosphere. Consequently, successful parties generally cater to a narrow segment where optimum comfort can be achieved.

i don’t know what the party you attended is like — but it’s quite possible that this is a response to similar situations.

also, for some reason, the mainstream swingers’ community is very focused on heterosexual, partner-swapping sorts of sex. there are some pansexual (f/f and m/m action encouraged) events in the city i live in, and there are some multiple partner events, but generally it seems that partner swapping is the typical behavior.